Happy Birthday Sweet Louie

None of Lucas’s choices for his birthday are healthy or low carb.

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Birthdays are a pretty big deal around here. They are not fancy but I do try to make them fun like mine were growing up. Growing up I don’t remember mom throwing us fancy parties but she always made it special. It’s not that they weren’t fancy because she didn’t care but because she simply didn’t have time – she worked two to three jobs at once to provide us with a good life and we had a REALLY good one growing up. We might have not had the latest toys at the moment but felt loved and cared for – we played a lot outside, rode bikes, ‘cooked’ with dirt from grandma’s garden – we had a really really simple but fun childhood. And looking back I wouldn’t change it for a second.

When it comes to our kid’s birthday parties I try to go with a theme of something they are into. The cakes are far from perfect but they are fun. And most importantly the kids love them.

Today, I would like to show you snip-its from Lucas’s little quarantine party. Turning 5 is a big deal but, unfortunately, he won’t be able to have friends over so we are doing the best we can to make it as memorable as possible, under the circumstances.

We have so MUCH to be thankful for – he’s healthy, smarter than he should be, he loves to sing, he’s super creative, he has the sweetest little heart and he loves Jesus. What else can we ask for?! A party? A bunch of gifts? Those are nice and exciting but having our little Louie is a celebration in itself. God knew our hearts needed him and for that we are so grateful!

Every year as Lucas’s birthday nears is another reminder how grateful we are to have him, not just have him as our son but actually have him here with us. It gives me so much anxiety when I think back to what could have been. It’s been almost 5 years and to this day I do not know why the events of that day played out the way they did. Lucas was 3 months old.

As I start to write this my body is trembling and my heart is racing.

I have never shared this publicly before but today I want to share a testimony with you about how marvelous my God is. On days that I don’t think I have much to be thankful for – all I need to do is look at our sweet boy. By all human understanding and measures he should not be here but God in His unconditional love to us spared my mama heart a lifetime of grief and for that I am so so GRATEFUL, THANKFUL and everything in between. God is so very merciful.

We had just come back from camping the day before (Saturday). Because we were gone the week before we decided to go out to lunch after church on Sunday. After lunch we stopped by our friends house (same friends we went camping with).

A little back story….all of our kids are very very mellow when they are little (they discover their voice around 18 months old). All my kids slept through the night the first day home from the hospital. It wasn’t unusual for us to come home and leave them in the car seat sleeping for a little bit.

Now back to that faithful Sunday. My husband drove that day and he has this crazy habit of leaving the windows a little bit open when he turns off the car. I CLEARLY REMEMBER picking on him that day that it’s a weird habit, he told me to leave him along and we went inside.

We get inside, kids are playing, we’re talking about the camping trip we just got back from, already making plans for next year, having coffee – a really relaxed Sunday afternoon. I was still nursing Lucas but when we went out I always grabbed my pump. As soon as we got to their house I made a mental note of what time it was because in an hour I needed to pump.

By this time the guys had moved to the couch and it didn’t take long for my husband to doze off. The time comes for me to pump and I realized I haven’t heard Lucas. I asked my husband which room he left him in and he ignores me. Not until the third (very firm) time does he actually answer me and says ‘I don’t know where you left him you grabbed him.’

When both of us go somewhere he ALWAYS grabbed the car seat.

‘I didn’t grab him, you did!’ I yell back to him. He stands his ground and says ‘no.’ I still cannot wrap my head around what is happening and all four of us adults started running around the lower level of my friends house looking for the car seat – nothing! I run to the garage – nothing! Like a crazy lady I start running to the van. The way the can was parked I could see the corner of the car seat. The entire search for him lasted no more than 35 seconds, from the time I realized I haven’t heard him to the time I was running to the van.

As I’m running, which felt like an eternity – I already had his funeral planned, that’s how time slowed down. I’m running and all I can see in front of me is a dead baby and it’s MY FAULT. I didn’t grab the car seat. How could I have not realized my baby wasn’t in the house?! As I get closer to the car I hear him crying, more like screaming – but he’s alive! He’s REALLY alive.

I was completely numb and in shock for the rest of the day. It wasn’t until the evening when the reality of the situation REALLY hit me. I had swaddled him for the night, placed him in the bassinet and rolled it near my bed like I did every night. And that’s when it hit me – that bassinet could have been empty forever if it wasn’t for God. I cried harder that night (and a few nights after) than I ever did. I still had a baby to care for and love on – what a miracle!

There were 4 adults and 2 older children and for an entire hour no one noticed – how could this have happened? I though my husband grabbed the car seat, he thought I grabbed it but it seems no one did.

I have seen stories in the news of this happening to parents and NEVER understood – how can a mother or father forget their child in a car?! How?! I never understood until it happened to me. One thought the other one grabbed the car seat – that’s how. I’ve learned to judge a little less when it comes to situations I have never been through.

A couple days later I went back and checked what the temperature was that Sunday, it was 91 degrees. I remember reading an article; after an hour the temperature in the car rises 43 degrees higher than it is outside. If it’s 91 outside than it’s close to 140 inside the car. How can my baby still be alive?!

GOD IS GOOD! GOD IS MERCIFUL! GOD IS UNEXPLAINABLE!

Sometimes we want to see very tremendous miracles but if we only look closer we can see God’s gently sprinkle of miracles all over our life. My husband habit of leaving the windows a bit open – gentle miracle! Lucas not having anything wrong with him – gentle miracle! Lucas being alive – is a TREMENDOUS miracle!

I know and wholeheartedly believe that God has a BIG plan for our boy!

This year Lucas requested a Lego themed birthday party – so that is what he got!

We had cake, ice pops, gummies, chocolate and a few presents.

Lets start with gummy Legos. You will need the following ingredients for EACH color you use. I do want to point out that brand name jello boxes work a tiny bit better than store brand. I have several sets of Lego molds, you can take a look here at the different sets. The more molds you have the quicker the process goes.

Ingredients

• 1/2 cup + 2 tbsp COLD water
• 1/4 cup light corn syrup
• 2 tbsp gelatin
• 1 box Jell-o (3oz)

Instructions

1. In a small sauce pan combine water and corn syrup. Allow it to sit a few minutes and stir until the syrup is completely dissolved.

2. To the saucepan, add gelatin and jello. Allow the mixture to sit 5-10 minute to allow the gelatin to bloom. After 10 minutes, stir mixture until most of the jello is dissolved.

3. On medium high heat bring the mixture to almost a boil, stirring constantly, remove from heat once you see a few bubbles. Allow the mixture to sit for a few minutes, you will see a thin white film over the top. With a spoon skim off the film and discard it.

4. Place your molds on a baking sheet and using a syringe fill each cavity with the gummy mixture. It’s very important to have your mixture as clear as possible. If there are any bubbles use the syringe to remove them. Carefully move the pan into the refrigerator. Allow it to completely harden, about 3 hours.

5. Carefully unmold the gummies. Yellow Legos didn’t make it into the picture – the kids got to them first.

I also made Lego chocolates. These are very simple to make. I worked with the Candy Melts colors I had at home.

Ingredients

• Wilton candy melts, different colors

Instructions

1. Melt each color separately and fill the molds half way.

2. Refrigerate for 20-30 minutes. Very gently unmold the Lego chocolates.

This year the cake did NOT turn out as I had hoped but you know what – that’s life! But Lucas didn’t seem to care. I personally do not like buttercream frosting, my favorite frosting is whipped cream frosting with a little twist. Because whipped cream frosting doesn’t hold its color too well, the colors were very pale compared to the bright Lego colors.

Ingredients

• 1 yellow cake mix (I prefer Aldi brand)
• 1 cup of milk
• 3 eggs
• 1 egg yoke
• 1/3 cup oil

1. Place all ingredients in a bowl. Mix until all ingredients are incorporated.

2. Line your pans with parchment paper and dived the batter evenly. Bake according to box instructions.

3. Once the cake has cooled, evenly level each layer serrated knife.

Whipped Cream Frosting

Ingredients

• 1.5 cups heavy whipping cream
• 1/3 cup sugar
• 1/3 cup whipped cream cheese
• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract

Instructions

1. Add all ingredients in a bowl of a stand mixer and beat on high until the frosting comes together and is perfectly smooth.

2. The frosting is ready to be used. If you are coloring the frosting divide it into separate bows and use your favorite food coloring/brand. Decorate your cake as desired.

For lunch Louie requested a bunch of his favorites. He wanted chicken, pelimeni (a version of dumplings), french fries and shrimp or shtrimps (as he calls them).

Sweet Lucas you make our family complete. You bring us so much happiness, joy and laughter. We pray that God would give you a heart of compassion, that He would Bless you with God-fearing friends, a great future but above all that you would grow up to be a man after God’s own Heart.